68/100 Days of Creativity: When it Snows

I vibble frequently. And I’m good at it. Heh, maybe I’ll add it to my curriculum vitae under ‘Areas of Expertise’ along with ‘professional waiter’. The story of my life, right there.

I’m meant to be looking for a job, but no-one’s hiring in this market. Or no-one’s interested in hiring someone like me. So I spend my days reading in the library. The library closes at 5pm, the shops close at 5:30pm and my sister doesn’t pick me up until 5:45pm. When it’s snowing outside the only thing to do is to vibble and wait.

—————————

For 100 consecutive days I will write and post a short story (about 100 words) incorporating a randomly selected word from Afterliff: A new dictionary of things there should be words for.

Today’s word:
vibble v.
To dither around inside a shop after closing time, wondering how long you have left.

Tomorrow’s word:
symbister n.
A pair of lovers who look like brother and sister.

67/100 Days of Creativity: From Yaffords to Bowsers

Jessica and I first met at the Yafford club. Jessica’s boxer, Fifi was dragging her along the footpath when Bruno cut in front and their leads became tangled. Struggling to slow the dogs down and untangle them led to coffee and three years later we walked down the aisle together; all four of us.

Fifi and Bruno have mellowed over the years and aren’t the young yaffords they once were so this week Jessica and I are taking the dogs to the Bowser club. We think when someone looks like their dog it is the ultimate display of  love and affection and we want to share that with others like us.

—————————

For 100 consecutive days I will write and post a short story (about 100 words) incorporating a randomly selected word from Afterliff: A new dictionary of things there should be words for.

Today’s word:
yafford n.
A dog that walks its owner.

Tomorrow’s word:
vibble v.
To dither around inside a shop after closing time, wondering how long you have left.

66/100 Days of Creativity: Not Happily Ever After

Heaven is not what I had imagined. I had imagined Heaven to be like the Three Bears welcoming Goldilocks into their home, happily sitting together around the table, and the porridge always being ‘just right’. Not too hot and not too cold.

But Heaven’s not like that at all. It’s like waiting for a train. St Peter checks your ticket and then directs you to another queue seemingly at random. I’ve been waiting in a furzey lodge with a handful of other people for two rainy days. The staff are surly and show no interest in me. There is porridge though. But it is certainly not ‘just right’.

—————————

For 100 consecutive days I will write and post a short story (about 100 words) incorporating a randomly selected word from Afterliff: A new dictionary of things there should be words for.

Today’s word:
furzey lodge n.
A cafe that looks like someone’s front room.

Tomorrow’s word:
yafford n.
A dog that walks its owner.

65/100 Days of Creativity: Invasion of the Body Snatchers

Troesel, Thelina and Turnich have been assigned a three week reconnaissance mission. After advising the three Alphabeasts of the importance of remaining undetected, the Dolphbot lets them choose their Earthling hosts.

Two weeks later: There have been several reports of unusual communications between John Key, Winston Peters and Kim Dotcom. It is alleged that the three have been secretly meeting to discuss a new future together. When questioned, all three vehemently deny such allegations. David Cunliffe remains ab lench, as usual.

Three weeks later: The Alphabeast Commander awards Turnich the highest honour for his successful invasion of David Cunliffe’s body.

—————————

For 100 consecutive days I will write and post a short story (about 100 words) incorporating a randomly selected word from Afterliff: A new dictionary of things there should be words for.

Today’s word:
ab lench adj.phr.
Not up for anything much, really: The opposite of ‘gung-ho’.

Tomorrow’s word:
furzey lodge n.
A cafe that looks like someone’s front room.

64/100 Days of Creativity: Personality Profile

If you have a cashel in your home you are:

  1. Likely to have traveled overseas in the previous 12 months.
  2. Hoping to travel to the same country in the next 12 months.
  3. Naive to think you will remember to empty your cashel before your next overseas trip.
  4. Stupid not to have spent all your overseas currency at the over-priced airport eateries before you returned home.
  5. Robbing the economy of the entire $7.35 sitting in your cashel. Think of the starving children in New Zealand!
  6. Likely to book an overseas trip to a new destination within the next three months.
  7. Repeat the above.

—————————

For 100 consecutive days I will write and post a short story (about 100 words) incorporating a randomly selected word from Afterliff: A new dictionary of things there should be words for.

Today’s word:
cashel n.
The bowl in which small useless foreign coins are kept.

Tomorrow’s word:
ab lench adj.phr.
Not up for anything much, really: The opposite of ‘gung-ho’.

63/100 Days of Creativity: True Love

‘Recoiling in disgust when you realise you’ve drunk from an eccup could be rendered obsolete by scientists who are confident that people will soon be able to replace lost teeth by growing new ones,’ says the TV health reporter.

‘…Tests have shown the technique to work in mice, where new teeth took weeks to grow. “We’re confident it will work in humans,” said Professor Deekay…’

‘Eeeeww! Sounds like a mad scientist experiment gone wrong. Even though I’m looking forward to growing old with you Duncan, I’d rather have you gummy than watch you grow new teeth,’ said Rachael to her husband who didn’t hear a word she said.

—————————

For 100 consecutive days I will write and post a short story (about 100 words) incorporating a randomly selected word from Afterliff: A new dictionary of things there should be words for.

Today’s word:
eccup n.
The mug that nobody uses because Grandad once kept his false teeth in it.

Tomorrow’s word:
cashel n.
The bowl in which small useless foreign coins are kept.

62/100 Days of Creativity: The End is Nigh

I’m proud to admit that in all my 83 years I’ve never been to McDonald’s. Don and I have fish and chips once a year, and that’s it. There’s nothing like home cooking.

I’m only going to McDonald’s because our grandson Liam has come to visit. He’s such a fussy eater, I don’t know what to feed him. All he can talk about is how great McDonald’s is. I order a Big Mac and a chocolate shake. When it arrives I’m a wee bit potto but Liam tells me this is normal. Everything always looks bigger and better on the menu.

—————————

For 100 consecutive days I will write and post a short story (about 100 words) incorporating a randomly selected word from Afterliff: A new dictionary of things there should be words for.

Today’s word:
potto adj.
Confused by the dish put in front of you, because it doesn’t look anything like the description in the menu.

Tomorrow’s word:
eccup n.
The mug that nobody uses because Grandad once kept his false teeth in it.